Fine Words Butter No Parsnips
Listen I don’t know what’s wrong with these parsnips but I have a few “fine” choice “words” for them. After I’m done I am sure you’ll grab the butter yourself and take care of these rather ridiculous parsnips.
Ever since Robert @thedevotea mentioned this little challenge I was curious what I’d write. First, I don’t know many parsnips and certainly can’t understand it’s reluctance to wanting to be “buttered” even if that butter are the words I write here. So I thought the best approach was to tell these parsnips who is boss and lay it all out there. I am going to take my buttery words and forcibly take these parsnips “50 Shades of Grey” style. Sorry, I just had to find a way to throw that in there. So let me share these “fine” words with you and you tell me if these “parsnips” should agree to be “buttered.”
The last six months have been an amazing and terrifying ride. I have gone through enormous personal change. I have taken my life into my own hands. I have stopped wishing I could be happier, healthier, and wealthier. I made some major and risky life choices. These choices have altered my personal trajectory. I am no longer at the same risk of heart disease I used to be, I am not looking at complete pancreatic failure, and don’t suffer from infertility anymore. I am living the literal dream I always wished I could live.
Here are the facts… I am no longer diabetic, I no longer have acid reflux, I no longer suffer from polycystic ovarian syndrome. Basically, I am no longer “fat” actually make that no longer morbidly obese. I am still over weight but I won’t be for long. I have energy, I am happy, I am the mother and wife I always imagined I’d be. Why? Because I stopped “buttering” my “parsnips.” I decided I matter too. You can’t take care of anyone until you take care of yourself first. These are very wise words I never really understood until now.
I didn’t start this journey to be inspirational. I did this for me. If I didn’t make a change I knew I would die much earlier than I should. I also knew I was looking at a number of health related issues as I aged. Some I was already seriously facing. My biggest issue was my diabetes, by the way I love saying “was” being that the issue is now past tense only solidifies my decision. My diabetes was seriously out of control. Not because I eat too many sweets or any of those stereotypical responses to someone with uncontrolled diabetes may be. No matter how much I watched my diet, which I DID I wasn’t able to grasp the control I needed. Just as I got close, my body decided to change the game. I was on insulin and pills. To this day I have so many black and blue marks on my abdomen that just won’t heal from all the daily injections. I hated the life I was trapped in, it felt like survival and not really living. I tried every “traditional” weight loss method out there. It was never the lack of drive it was my body that was failing me. My doctors were telling me there was a chance that my pancreas was being so over taxed that it was getting ready to fail. I was terrified and it wasn’t that I was terrified for myself. I didn’t want to leave my kids. They need a mother, they need me and I need them.
I decided it was time I did whatever it took to save my life. People think you are a cheater, people think you took an easy way out. I dare anyone out there to go through what I did and say the same thing. This was the single more difficult decision I have ever had to make in my whole life. I was terrified I would die on the table, that my kids would be left without a mother my husband without his wife. I did this because I refused to fail. I did this because I am not a quitter. I did this because of my family. I tried every other medically safe option before coming to this decision and nothing worked. Hormones control so much of what your body does and in my case they were king.
Last August 22nd 2014 after five months of education, tests, and preparation I underwent gastric bypass surgery. I had intended to originally try the band because it was suppose to be less evasive. However, it isn’t effective for those with diabetes. I didn’t get the surgery to be a skinny and try to live a life that wasn’t mine. I did it to do something drastic about my diabetes. Doctors don’t know why but many people either go into remission or have an extremely reduced case of diabetes and without even losing a pound after having surgery. Apparently there is a type of hormone in the stomach that is affected by this surgery that can help people with diabetes. So I decided if I was going to go through this I was going to make the best decision to help me with my situation. Let me make this clear. No amount of dieting and exercising could have put me into the remission I am in now. This was my only option and I took it. I had already been suffering with diabetes for nearly two decades. At my age that is a very long time. Considering the length of time and the severity of my case if I didn’t take a more drastic approach I was on the path to blindness. I had already been diagnosed with a cotton wool spot which has since resolved. I don’t want to lose any of my appendages and mostly I didn’t want to be any kind of burden on my family.
It was the single best decision I ever made. I almost backed out on the day of surgery but managed to get the pros to out weight the cons. I have a fantastic support group. My family and friends all supported my decision and they were there for me. I know some of you can’t imagine why someone would do something so drastic and that is okay. I am not writing this to justify my actions or get your approval. This was the right decision for me. I am off ALL of my medications. I only take vitamins. I am down over 70 pounds and have only 19 pounds to go before I reach my personal goal. I have created new positive behaviors, such as daily exercise and healthy eating. I have been on some kind of medication or another since I was 21 years old. Now it’s over, I don’t have to take anything anymore. It is this that drives me to be better, to work harder, eat better, and get to the gym.
I am happy and living a generally “butter” free lifestyle. So there is plenty of butter to go around “parsnips” I’m passing the butter onto you because I don’t need any, anymore. So take these “fine words” and slather it on baby.
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When I am not running after the kids, managing the household, and homeschooling my oldest I enjoy blogging about my passions and how it applies to my life.
Thank you for reading!